e+mail
diary+land
+even Superman can't wipe his own ass...+
+11.03.03
+ 9:41 p.m.
+
I am ready to give up. I thought I could do this, I thought I was strong enough to take it all on and keep moving forward.
I don't think I can.
This isn't me seeking out pity or claiming that my life is worse than hers and his and theirs.
I'm not.
I know in the grand scheme of things I have it pretty fucking good.
But I also know that I'm ready to crack.
I'm tired of worrying about everyone else and making sure they're okay first and foremost. I'm tired of trying to cheer everyone up when they are pissed off at the world. I'm tired of waking up every morning curled up in a ball because it hurts too bad to move.
I'm tired of being told that there are no answers.
I'm tired of never having a day off from everything.
I'm tired of feeling like I'm ready to collapse at the end of the day.
I'm tired of downplaying how I feel so as not to sound like I'm seeking attention.
I'm not asking you for anything except maybe just some tiny shred of understanding.
If you're in a bad mood, don't take it out on me.
If I can't be 100% efficent just be patient.
If I tend to get a bit emotional at times, let it go.
I'm trying
I'm trying
I'm trying.
What the fuck more do you want from me?